You should see what it looks like when she exhales and lets it all out….

On Christmas Eve, 2004, I brought Emma to her favorite place in Oxford: St. Mary’s Tower. I had a ring in my pocket, and plans to propose minutes later at the top of the tower, surrounded by incredible views of the surrounding colleges, hills and spires. My nerves were positively singing.

As the fates would have it—and contrary to what I’d read on the website—the tower was closed for renovations; a chain across the steps barred our entrance. This stroke of misfortune was punctuated by the sudden onset of freezing rain.

“Unbelievable,” I muttered. “This is just completely unbelievable.”

“Stop being such a baby,” Emma said, and suggested we head to Marks and Spencer to finish our Christmas shopping.

All worked out fine, as I eventually cajoled Emma into taking a walk with me (in the rain) into the hills behind her parents’ house later that afternoon, where I proposed on the hilltop pictured in the header of this site. The rain broke when it should have, and Emma responded as I’d hoped she would.

In any case, I had a score to settle with the tower. We returned to St. Mary’s on this last trip to Oxford, and had the main turret all to ourselves.

It was a different set of circumstances this time: a pregnant Emma climbing the steps in front of me; the ring on her hand instead of clutched nervously in my pocket; no fanfare, and no single moment more important than the rest—just a long, beautiful, unforgettable afternoon.

On a recent business trip to lovely Baltimore, I stopped at my favorite airport burrito joint, California Tortilla. I was amazed at some of the hot sauces on offer, including notables such as “Pain & Suffering,” “Rectum Ripper XXX 1/2″, and my favorite name, “Ass in the Tub Hot Sauce,” all of which were entirely used up.

Now, what name could possibly dissuade people from trying a bottle of hot sauce? If “Rectum Ripper” doesn’t do it, I’m not sure anything will.

You can’t say you weren’t warned.

I was very pleased to see the news this morning that the Labour Party’s Rudd has defeated Howard in the race for Aussie PM. One of Rudd’s first moves will be to sign the Kyoto pact, leaving (cough cough) the U.S. and Kazakhstan as the only signatories who haven’t ratified the pact.

Peter Garrett (of Midnight Oil fame) will soon step in as Australia’s Climate Change Minister.

Now all that’s left is to count down the 400 or so remaining days in the Worst Presidency in U.S. Historyâ„¢, and we can all breathe a little easier.